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Sunday, October 20, 2013

Here's hoping.

I was really hoping that this pregnancy would be like my others this year and whatever changes happening would make my schizophrenia symptoms not quite so bad.  Unfortunately, I don't think that's the case this time.  They've actually gotten a bit worse at times and I'm not liking it.  I'm still hopeful that they will get better once my stress levels go down a bit, but I don't know.

I've not been feeling great.  I've had pretty bad morning sickness and I've been cramping pretty bad for the last few days.  On top of all that, physically I've been feeling like shit because of the weather changes and all that comes with that.  I can't wait until it's just cool all the time and not going back and forth so much.

I've not been sleeping well, so I know that makes the hallucinations worse and I really need to make sure I get more sleep.  I'm terrified that I'll have another seizure and something bad will happen.  I don't know.  It's useless to worry.  I just need to focus on staying positive for now.

On a happier note, we found a store downtown that sells top hats!  We were walking around downtown on his lunch break Saturday and decided to stop in and look.  We found a really nice one that looks amazing on him!  It was $135, so we called it his early birthday present and now he has an amazing top  hat!  He still hasn't gotten dressed up for me, but I'm hoping he will later this week.  He looks so good in it!

Friday, October 18, 2013

Here we are.

Well, I'm pregnant!   Due June 11, 2014.  I've been feeling really awful the last week or so and my go-to ways of making it better just aren't cutting it.

I'm trying to stay hopeful that this time will finally be the one, but I just can't shake the feeling that I'm just killing time until it's over. 

I don't really have much else to say at this point, just that I feel miserable.